Sometimes somebody says something that cuts you right to the heart. It's when God speaks, usually (Hebrews 4:12).
Are we ADMIRERS of Christ ...
or FOLLOWERS ?
Friday, September 29, 2006
Friday, September 22, 2006
Geoff; Bob; Keith
Where is all this going, I sense my emotions quizzing my intellect. My intellect replies in cold terms that it’s not in charge of direction, merely the rational executions of the decisions of my will. The will in itself pipes up and asks why the emotions have to be so damn touchy feely about the whole thing and then we’re back to square one.
I’m learning to embrace these little lulls and bouts of melancholia. They mostly arise when public transport goes awry, but also when Manchester City go on a downward spiral. How I am not a manic depressive on these terms I don’t know . . . in any case. Back to informed and emotionally aware blogging.
Do you ever ask rhetorical questions to the ether in the hope that you might discover what you feel you’re lacking? I am lacking something at the moment – it feels like I’ve had and lost something in my spirituality, though that might be down to rounded on to do JOBS rather than be part of something. As far as being defined by my roles goes I’ve messed up a bit.
Why don’t I live in Plymouth?
I’m learning to embrace these little lulls and bouts of melancholia. They mostly arise when public transport goes awry, but also when Manchester City go on a downward spiral. How I am not a manic depressive on these terms I don’t know . . . in any case. Back to informed and emotionally aware blogging.
Do you ever ask rhetorical questions to the ether in the hope that you might discover what you feel you’re lacking? I am lacking something at the moment – it feels like I’ve had and lost something in my spirituality, though that might be down to rounded on to do JOBS rather than be part of something. As far as being defined by my roles goes I’ve messed up a bit.
Why don’t I live in Plymouth?
Monday, September 18, 2006
Darn those journos
The Muslim world is again agreived by the perceived Christian West. A nutter fringe group comes out and says
"We tell the worshipper of the cross (the Pope) that you and the West will be defeated, as is the case in Iraq, Afghanistan, Chechnya. God enable us to slit their throats, and make their money and descendants the bounty of the Mujahideen."
Just a quick point - I'm no cross worshipper. Discuss.
"We tell the worshipper of the cross (the Pope) that you and the West will be defeated, as is the case in Iraq, Afghanistan, Chechnya. God enable us to slit their throats, and make their money and descendants the bounty of the Mujahideen."
Just a quick point - I'm no cross worshipper. Discuss.
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Life on hold
Do hold on in there, this might be a long one. I have several weeks worth of shame and regret to get through before the blog is out ...
I think in ad man's terms they call that a teaser. In truth I don't know where this post is oging, yet feel a strange compulsion to be writing something. My brain has been called into action on such rare occasions over the last fortnight that I scarce remember what it feels like to be switched on, wired, prepared mentally and emotionally.
I have been on my travels recently. I think this is a euphemism for me being bored and having no-one to pester. I have been to France for ages and to Exeter.
Meeting new people is a funny one for me - I have many acquaintances and fewer genuine friends. My desire is to be known. I don't like it when people think more of me than they have a right to be virtue of the fact I sing some simple songs at church. I don't like to think that people might be reading me and reading me correctly. i take solace in the fact that some of best friends now I completely mis-read on first encounter. So there is hope for the future. But in this moment I discovered some things about myself that were quite hard to take while I was on holiday.
Alcohol makes me miserable. Coffee makes me joyous. Headaches never stop.
28 degrees is perfect weather.
The worst thing in the world is when you find someone slightly hard to get on with / relate to precisely because they remind so damn much of yourself and the things you feel weakest about that its scary.
Is it wrong to keep your mouth shut when to open it would open cans of worms and weaken other poeples' faiths just because you shared some ideas that you had trouble with? I refer as always to our slightly mixed up notions of eternity and the influence of Gnostic and Platonic on eschatology.
Grief. Incoherance appears to be my friend.
I love my community , yet I choose to be alone. I profess to love, but I serve myself. I am happy to be the guy in the leadership position as long as people know me, but can't deal with the same issues I see in others with integrity in myself.
the more that life goes on the more I realise the depth of my fall. If only I could glimpse the depth and subsequent height of my rescue.
In closing I strongly advise you to go to a 4star gite in the country followed by a trip to exeter. It is guaranteed to make you well aware of the chasm in meaning that pervades modern society.
Peace Out. I need some
M
I think in ad man's terms they call that a teaser. In truth I don't know where this post is oging, yet feel a strange compulsion to be writing something. My brain has been called into action on such rare occasions over the last fortnight that I scarce remember what it feels like to be switched on, wired, prepared mentally and emotionally.
I have been on my travels recently. I think this is a euphemism for me being bored and having no-one to pester. I have been to France for ages and to Exeter.
Meeting new people is a funny one for me - I have many acquaintances and fewer genuine friends. My desire is to be known. I don't like it when people think more of me than they have a right to be virtue of the fact I sing some simple songs at church. I don't like to think that people might be reading me and reading me correctly. i take solace in the fact that some of best friends now I completely mis-read on first encounter. So there is hope for the future. But in this moment I discovered some things about myself that were quite hard to take while I was on holiday.
Alcohol makes me miserable. Coffee makes me joyous. Headaches never stop.
28 degrees is perfect weather.
The worst thing in the world is when you find someone slightly hard to get on with / relate to precisely because they remind so damn much of yourself and the things you feel weakest about that its scary.
Is it wrong to keep your mouth shut when to open it would open cans of worms and weaken other poeples' faiths just because you shared some ideas that you had trouble with? I refer as always to our slightly mixed up notions of eternity and the influence of Gnostic and Platonic on eschatology.
Grief. Incoherance appears to be my friend.
I love my community , yet I choose to be alone. I profess to love, but I serve myself. I am happy to be the guy in the leadership position as long as people know me, but can't deal with the same issues I see in others with integrity in myself.
the more that life goes on the more I realise the depth of my fall. If only I could glimpse the depth and subsequent height of my rescue.
In closing I strongly advise you to go to a 4star gite in the country followed by a trip to exeter. It is guaranteed to make you well aware of the chasm in meaning that pervades modern society.
Peace Out. I need some
M
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